National Lost Sock Memorial Day

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I can’t imagine why it would, but in case it slipped your mind, I wanted to remind you that National Lost Sock Memorial Day is next Wednesday May 9th. Below is an example of an obituary you can use for your lost socks.

It is with deep sorrow in my heart that I am writing of the untimely passing of Left Pink Polka Dot Sock, Left Women’s Fashion Turtle Sock, and Right Plain White Sock. All three socks lived extraordinary lives and touched every person with whom they came into contact.

Left Pink Polka Dot Sock was a beloved, respected member of the Polka Dot family. She is leaving behind her sole mate, Right Pink Polka Dot Sock.

Left Women’s Fashion Turtle Sock enjoyed long rides in the washer and dryer and was a socker for being worn to bed. She is leaving behind Right Women’s Fashion Turtle Sock.

Right Plain White Sock’s will be remembered for his instrumental versatility in both basic and elegant outfits. He was preceded in death by Left Plain White Sock several months ago.

Though these socks are gone, their memories remain. May they go forth from this world in peace.

Their memorial service will take place in my bedroom on May 9th at 5:00PM. All residents of my sock drawer are invited to offer their condolences.